In metaphysical texts such as A Course In Miracles, the ego is the voice in your head that is opposite of The Holy Spirit’s voice. Wayne Dyer says the ego “edges God out.” If you read The Power of Now or A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle (both highly recommended), he speaks a lot of “the ego.”
So how do we know when that voice in our head is The Holy Spirit or the ego speaking to us? A Course In Miracles says the ego speaks first and speaks loudest.
I see a lot of adolescent girls as clients who are “new girls” at their school. When I worked as a middle school counselor, I would see “new girls” start at my school all the time. They would move-in in the middle of the year for various reasons. It always seemed that some drama would revolve around the new girl.
As a counselor, you really aren’t supposed to give advice. You are supposed to guide and coach. But let’s be realistic. This is middle school. Advice is needed.
So what advice would I give the new girl? I would tell her to sit back and wait. I would tell her that maybe the first girl who tries to latch onto her isn’t the best choice for a friend.
Why is this? Because many times the first girl that tries to latch on to the new girl has, let’s face it, problems. Chances are, she has already edged everyone else out and is looking for new prey. She’s looking for the weakest link. Who better than the new girl?
The girl who latches onto the new girl wants someone who will long and beg for her attention. She will tell the new girl that she is pretty and then talk about her behind her back. She will make the new girl think she is crazy and that she did something wrong. She will confuse the new girl when she tells her she is her new best friend and then she doesn’t invite her to come with when she gets a better offer. She will invite her to the party and then ignore her.
She is the first one who spoke to the new girl. She spoke first and loudest, the same as the ego.
So how do you get rid of the ego? Well, you can’t. Just as you can’t get rid of that girl at school, sorry girls. What you CAN do is even better. You take its power away. You don’t feed into it. You let it starve.
As “the new girl,” you are aware now that the girl at school is lying to you. Instead of feeding into her lies, you choose to sit back and wait for an honest friend. This friend will always be there. This friend isn’t afraid of her demise. This friend is constant and strong and brave. But you have to wait.
This friend is gentle, so you won’t find her by being rough. This friend is quiet so you won’t find her by being loud. This friend is meant-to-be so you won’t find her by trying to make things happen.
You must be patient, she is. You must be kind, she is. You must not suffer, she won’t let you.
This is the same as the Holy Spirit versus the ego. The ego will say things to you that cause fear and chaos. The voice in your head that usually speaks first and loudest is the one that says that things will not be ok. It says you will be happy when something happens in the future. These are false promises. The ego wants you attached to the external/physical world. It wants you to latch onto it, so it can take you on a crazy roller coaster ride.
The Holy Spirit’s voice will bring you a sense of peace and calm. The Holy Spirit brings inspiration (which means “in spirit”). The Holy Spirit says you don’t need anything from this physical world to be happy. You can be happy NOW.
The ego is very chaotic and confusing. If your life is chaotic and confusing, you are probably listening to the ego. It’s not your fault. You didn’t know they were putting cocaine in the coca cola.
But now you do. Now that you know, you can choose not to drink the coca cola anymore. You can choose to wait, watch, and listen for a more peaceful existence. Your friend is waiting for you to choose her. When you do, the gates of heaven will open, and you will never be the new girl again.
Peace, Love, and The New Girl,
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